My Ukrainian Dating Experience: Intercultural issues & age gaps
Editor: Krystyna, founder of Ukrainian Dating Blog & Ukrainian Dating Stories and speaker at the iDate conference. On this blog she shares her knowledge and experiences with international dating and intercultural relationship. Read more
Editor: Krystyna, passionate dating blogger, speaker and author read more
I wanted to tell you about my first experience with a Ukrainian woman.
How my story started on a dating site
I joined a site called Rosebrides last July after reading about Ukrainian women.
It didn’t take long to meet several women, age didn’t seem to matter. I couldn’t believe how many women were searching for an American man .I started getting numerous emails from one in particular, she was only 28 and I was 48 at the time. She had a daughter that was 5 at the time. We exchanged personal emails and I actually downloaded and set up a Skype account.
We chatted there on a daily basis for at least an hour almost every day. We even exchanged phone numbers and talked on the phone a couple of times. She spoke good English but was hard to understand, she is a teacher of German and English at a college. A very smart young woman.
Read more: Ukrainian Dating Experiences
My first Ukrainian dating experience
We decided to meet so I made plans to meet and we did in the middle of November last year in Kiev. She is from Vinnystya.
We met and it was almost like we knew everything about each other from all our communication. We spent 4 days together, then she went back to her city and I hired a realtor to show me some farms around Cherkassy and Kiev. I am a farmer here in Texas so I was interested in agriculture in Ukraine. I may someday invest in it.
On the second weekend she came back to Kiev and we spent 3 more days together and truthfully I was in heaven.
Age gap is an obstacle
After coming back to the USA we continued on and after Christmas here I went back there the first week of January and she again traveled back to Kiev with her young daughter and we spent New Years and a week together. I loved her daughter and we had a great time.
I asked her when I could meet her entire family and she said never. I was a little confused by this. I came back and we decided to start the process of obtaining a fiancé visa for her. She gathered all of her information and me mine. She dhl hers to me and after reading hers, I saw that her parents were my age.
Inability to live two lives
I asked her if that was the reason of me never meeting her family and all she said was I was like all men, wanted something they couldn’t ever had. So then I asked how she would plan traveling back to visit. I didn’t expect her to forget her family. I even said we could go back to Ukraine at least twice a year to visit, I mean Christmas is great like Easter; Ukraine is a week behind the USA. I thought it was perfect.
Anyway back to the story, she finally said she would go back alone with daughter and I would have to stay here and wait. After lots of thought about it and finally deciding that she wanted 2 lives, one with me and my finally here and her and her family there, so I ended it.
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Why such intercultural issues arise?
It was a very hard decision after spending all the effort of going there 2 times.
But I think it was the right decision and a lesson well learned, I think that 20 years is to much of an age gap, even if our personalities were great together.
Apparently her family thought so to? Mine was fine with it, I have 3 grown children and the oldest is her age. None of them had a problem with it as long as we were happy. So now I am still searching and am convinced a Ukrainian woman is the way to go, their values are so much better than what it seems American women are.
One more try to find my woman
I have joined another site Ukrainebrides.net and have raised the age to at least 10 years to mine. I have met several and now I have picked one that is 10 years younger and the first thing I ask is will I get to meet all her family. She said yes of course without hesitation.
The only thing about that site is it is a money machine; it won’t let us trade personal emails like the other one. Do you have a suggestion? I started to rejoin the Rosebrides again but I don’t want to run into the last one there so I didn’t do it. Would like your thoughts on this story and any suggestions?
In my opinion, an age gap in an intercutural relationship is a very individual issue. I am sure that relationships with a great age difference can work and I know some examples of such couples in Germany. However, people need to think about the pros and cons of a relationship with a big age gap.
I personally cannot imagine my relationship with the man who is older than me by 20 years. The age difference is too big. People can understand each other perfectly, but still there are different views about life, different levels of energy, different ideas about spending free time, vacations, careers, etc. A 5-10 age gape looks much better.
Read More: International Dating Stories
I think the first girl has some problems with her family and therefore she did not want to introduce you to her family. There may be of course other reasons. Her parents may be skeptical of your significant age gap. Maybe not… It is difficult to say. You made a hard decision. I hope that you do not regret it. I can understand your decision – family plays a great role in our life and having 2 lives is not the best option.
Honestly, I have never heard about Ukrainebrides.net and Rosebrides.com and could thus tell no opinion about their services. I could recommend you LoveMe.com or ElenasModels.com. They are the biggest dating sites in this field.
Our Tipp: How to Choose the Best International Online Dating Services for You
About the editor: Krystyna is an International dating blogger and writer. Here you find more than 500 articles on dating Slavic, Asian and Latin ladies. In her regularly updated blog posts, Krys has shown a keen eye for online dating issues, romance scam and cross-cultural relationships.
Questions? Feel free to ask Krystyna, your International dating blogger 🙂 (s. here: Contact Krystyna)
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